The voice in me

Now where was I with the whole finding myself thing .

My mind is slowly accepting the decision of being celibate and intentionally getting to know myself better. There are comments of situations that have happend in the past few days which under normal circumstances would have hurt me pretty bad, but I wasn’t even bothered.

It kinder surprised me. I met someone from my past who I knew I had a weak spot in my heart for this person. They have always sent mixed signals then and even now. It used to bother me a lot but of late I discovered I couldn’t care less. This person nolonger have a hold on me.

Recently I respected my feeling towards a certain happening at work. I expressed them and had the issue addressed. It liberated me in a way. But I must say it wasn’t easy.  I literally cried afterwards because its not something I usually do. The feeling of guilt wanted to take over not to mention the tension at my work place.

Whether the issue was handled well or not,I was proud that for the first time I actually respected my feelings ,my hurt soul and disturbed peace of mind. I didn’t try to hide anything or just keep things in my heart. I had the matter addressed.  Well this of cause has come with a lot of cold shoulders because like I said it’s something I never did and offense was taken by people who wernt even involved. 

On a different note, I came across a post that said

“Knowledge is confidence “

Been trying to build up my confidence by increasing my knowledge in various things. Hoping this will help me in the long run.

Last but not least, am embarking on a journey of finding my sense of style as a lady.  From the way I dress to the way i do my hair,my overal look. Am trying to figure out what works for me. I have always been a shadow to other people’s styles particularly my sisters .

It hasn’t been easy I must say.

But am soldiring on.

Am on a journey to find my own voice and learn how to use it.